i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
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There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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