I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
