I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
