If that was your dad, he is hot
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize