why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
