Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Randomize