just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
