if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Randomize
