I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
