mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize