its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
