Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize