Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
you made out with another girl for some wings
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
