Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize