drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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