I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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