You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
