My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
