got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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