Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize