No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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