You can't motorboat a personality
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
