I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
two words...techno handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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