You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.