Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.