I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
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