I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
