Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize