Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
