I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
