he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
