I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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