Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
