PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
