It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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