nut hugger
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
