i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
She even gives head with a lisp.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I can't turn off my feet"
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
