Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
