Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
