if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
