You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
