Nicole vs. Life
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
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