help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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