if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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