i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize