is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
