I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
