I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
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Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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