Well douche your snatch and let's go!
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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