We named our party play list daddy issues
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
