I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I'm really busy with my period
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