It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I can feel your judgement through the phone
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
